Greg Dyke: England’s woes are beyond the curse of “Johnny Foreigner”

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After the chairman of the FA blamed the number of foreign players in the Premier League for ruining the national side, James Dutton asks why prejudiced and selective memories still course through English football’s memory…

“ARGH! Damn those pesky foreign footballers, they keep coming over here taking away our homegrown players! ARGH! I just wish they’d stop!”

“ARGH! We created this insatiable commercial cash-cow of a league and they all come over here wanting a piece of it! ARGH! It’s just not fair anymore!”

“ARGH! Just look at how many more home based players there were back in 1992. How things were better in 1992. HUMPH!””

“THEY TOOK OUR JOB!”

Continue reading

Ross Barkley: The next victim of English football’s conflicted interests?

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Chris Francis discusses Ross Barkley’s premature call-up to the senior England squad and the structural schisms in the national game…

The call-up of Ross Barkley to the England senior set-up is not indicative of why England lag so far behind European teams. This is what I heard some commentators say today. There are deeper, structural issues that exist in the English game that hold the national team back. These will not be fixed quickly.

The call up of a young player who is playing well is not a surprise; this happens everywhere. Barkley has been known amongst the football world as a special midfielder for a long time. Only a serious injury two seasons ago stopped him appearing in David Moyes plans more regularly. Fully recovered, via a successful loan spell at Sheffield Wednesday, he has now played exceptionally in both of Roberto Martinez’s first two games in charge of the Toffees. Any country who has a youngster bossing games in their top division would promote him early, especially as he has played and excelled for every age-group along the way. Two games is early I admit, but still, this is meant to be a very special player. Continue reading

How loving England made me hate England

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TFN’s resident Dutchman Elko Born tries to shed some light on England, Stevie G and possibly the English psyche from a continental perspective…

Whenever England play, be it in a major tournament or a friendly match, two things seem certain. First:  if the opposition is any good, England will be likely to lose, and second:  in the run up to the match, people are likely to talk about the fact that England are likely to lose.

If the English garden party I attended last week is anything to go by, this talk about the likeliness of England losing is done in good fun. The jokes are made with a healthy dose of light hearted cynicism. People will snigger at Roy Hodgson and poke fun at his prehistoric, stubbornly English view of the game – subtly ignoring the fact that the FA’s European experiments with Sven and Fabio failed miserably. They’ll laugh at Wayne Rooney and his hair, Steven Gerrard and his boyish, rather naive looking enthusiasm, and, not to forget, whoever John Terry and/or Ashley Cole might be sleeping with at the moment.

‘I used to love England as a boy,’ someone confided in me at the garden party, both hands clutching a Pimms. ‘But now I’ve given up on them. I think WC ’98 was the last tournament I genuinely enjoyed, when it comes to England.’

I chuckled, of course, only stopping to sip my gin and tonic. I was having a good time there in the garden, with the perfectly cut grass and beautiful flowers surrounding me, feeling very, very English. I too had given up on England, and I too don’t really enjoy watching them play anymore. I was having a much better time poking fun at the build-up and dissections in the days before and after matches. Continue reading

What’s next for Marcelo Bielsa? Five jobs for football’s tactical fundamentalist

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Greg Johnson rustles up five potential new dug-outs for the man behind “vertical football” to takeover this summer…

Marcelo Bielsa needs a new job. Although cited by Jonathan Wilson as the progenitor to football’s current obsession with ball retention and worshipped as a sort of tactical deity by his fans, he is currently unemployed after parting ways with Athletic Club of Bilbao.

Having masterminded Athletic to two finals last season, losing out as runners-up to Atletico Madrid and Barcelona in the Europa League and Copa Del Rey respectively, this year the man they call El Loco hasn’t fared so well. With the loss of Javi Martinez to Bayern Munich and a distracted Fernando Llorente dropped from the starting line-up, the €40M received from the German champions did little to help plug the gaps left by such vital players due to the club’s Basque-only recruitment policy.

Now the eccentric former Argentina and Chile coach is left searching for a fresh project to work his idiosyncratic ways on, but where can he go?

Too head strong and unpredictable for the Real Madrid hot seat, and too alternative to be short-listed as Ancelotti’s successor at Paris Saint-Germain, he’s a manager whose methods are better suited to open-minded underdogs and sides just outside of the established big club orthodoxy.

Here are five jobs that may interest football’s tactical fundamentalist. Continue reading

England and the Media in a Hodge-Podge

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Following England’s 1-1 draw with Montenegro, James Dutton assesses the managerial capabilities of media darling Roy Hodgson…

“I thought we hung on well and finished strongly but during their good spell they got an equaliser and robbed us of a victory. All things considered, we mustn’t be too disappointed,”

- Roy Hodgson, March 2013.

Sound familiar? We’ve heard it all before from Roy. This time a 1-1 draw in Montenegro, snatched from the jaws of victory following a second half that encapsulated the passive style that Roy Hodgson sides display.

It’s the same story, just a different day. Continue reading

Another False Dawn for England?

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The False Nine editor, James Dutton, looks into Theo Walcott’s claim that this is the best England squad in his time with the national side…

So Theo Walcott has claimed this is the best England squad he’s been part of.

It certainly is a bold claim from the Arsenal forward. After all, this is the same Walcott who was plucked from Arsenal’s reserves by Sven Goran Eriksson at the age of 16 and invited to experience, first hand, England’s 2006 World Cup debacle. WAGs, metatarsals and prima donnas dominated the headlines, whilst poor little Theo was forced to watch on helpless. Continue reading

Steven Gerrard – 100 Not Out

Steven Gerrard through the ages

With Steven Gerrard in-line to earn his 100th England cap in Sweden this week, The False Nine’s James Dutton looks back at his career and the perpetuation of certain media perceptions…

It has been a ceremonial few weeks for Steven Gerrard. He netted his 150th goal in professional football during Liverpool’s clash with Manchester United in September, a poignant strike in the wake of the revelations about the Hillsborough disaster, of which the youngest victim, Jon-Paul Gilhooley, was his cousin. At the beginning of this month the Liverpool captain made his 600th appearance for his club; this week he will earn his 100th cap for his country. Continue reading